So it's Valentine's Day. Hurray! And yes, there is a tone of sarcasm in there (it doesn't come across well in print). Forgive the cynicism but this holiday often brings that out of me. That might have a lot to do with the fact that once again I am single during it, but for a holiday that comes across as being exclusively for couples and seems to punish those who are not part of one, I think I have a right to feel this way. It's like that episode of The Simpsons where Burns tells the plant that everyone who's found love can leave early. Everyone cheers and runs off, except for one poor guy who looks down at the floor sadly while a single tear runs down his cheek. That's how I feel today.
Romance in general has been a touchy point for me lately, and part of that is my tendency to watch court shows while I'm off during the day. There have been soooo many cases involving exes, and it seems to be a feature today. All these people who were once head over heels in love and now hate each other with a blistering passion. It's sad, kind of sick in it's own way, and seems to be fairly common.
Now me, I've never been big on dating. Which is kind of a problem, as everyone tells me I have to get out there if I want to meet the guy of my dreams. Yeah. Dating, to me, is exactly what Jerry Seinfeld once described it as; "A job interview that lasts all night".
My brother thinks part of the problem, not just for me but for a lot of girls, is what he likes to call "Disney-itis". He defines it as that unrealistic expectation that a lot of Disney movies, and movies in general, instill in women that there is a perfect guy out there and once you meet him, you'll know. My brother insists life isn't like that, that you have to kiss a few frogs to get to the prince, and that a lot of great guys are getting passed up because they don't meet that 'Prince' criteria. To give you an example, after doing the Tim Burton exhibit I put on Corpse Bride last night, one of my favorite Burton movies. Despite it's grim subject matter, it's a very romantic movie, and features one of my best loved movie couples, Victor and Victoria, two soft-spoken individuals who have been intended for each other by their parents, and find from their first meeting that their wedding, that they'd both been dreading, couldn't come fast enough. Unfortunately, a mistake and a lovely but dead bride named Emily throws a wrench in the proceedings. But you just know that love will conquer all, right?
My brother may have a point, that a lot of movies may instill unrealistic expectations about what romance and courtship should be (I mean, some of them do feature the living marrying the dead after all). But I can't help but wonder, well, what's wrong with finding your perfect mate? I see so many women in these daytime TV shows putting up with sub-par men for a variety of reasons, likely because romance eliminated all traces of logic and common sense in them, but one likely reason being that they just don't want to be alone or they're under pressure to be in a relationship by the people around them. So they cause themselves no limit of heartache dealing with these losers just so they can say they have a Valentine on Valentine's Day. What the hell? I admit I haven't dated much in my life, but I knew from a very young age that I would much rather be alone than with someone who doesn't get me, who doesn't make me happy or excited or passionate. In short, I'm not willing to waste my time with someone unless there's even a remote chance that he'll check off any of the above list. Not all of it necessarily, but at least some if it. At the very least, I want to be excited to see his email rather than "Oh God, I guess I should answer him and be polite out of a sense of societal obligations". I've never had that before. Really, is that so much to ask? That I find a guy who makes me feel happy, who can talk to me and understand what I feel and just makes me feel love and loved?
In the mean time, I'm going to go treat myself a little today, maybe with a cupcake and a new book, and get a heart shaped pizza for me and my roommate. Why the hell not? If you can't love yourself, you can't love anyone else, right?
And as for romance one day coming my way, well, hope springs eternal. Someday, my prince will come...
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